


Reaffirmation

by Differentshadesofgrey



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Companion Piece, Declarations Of Love, F/M, Kissing, Porn with Feelings, Sex, Smut, a tiny bit of angst if you squint
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-05
Updated: 2019-09-05
Packaged: 2020-10-10 18:21:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,537
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20532494
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Differentshadesofgrey/pseuds/Differentshadesofgrey
Summary: You and Rafael are reunited after your break up, you reaffirm your love for each other. With sex. Because. Obviously.Smutty companion piece to Heartbreak & Death Threats / Making Amends. It’ll have more context if you read those first but it’s not essential.





	Reaffirmation

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: This is basically a smutty companion piece for Making Amends which itself was a companion piece to Heartbreak & Death Threats. I wasn’t intending to write it but it wouldn’t leave me alone.
> 
> It’s really just porn with feelings, so it’s not essential to read the other 2 parts first if you haven’t already, but if you feel like it then please do!
> 
> Pairing: Rafael Barba/Reader  
Warnings: NSFW, porn with feelings, sex  
Word Count: 2,537

You didn’t know how long you stood in Rafael’s office, locked in his embrace. Your head resting on his shoulder, face buried in the crook of his neck, reveling in the feeling of being held by him again. His fingers carded gently through your hair as he murmured his apologies and reaffirmed his love for you, over and over again.

Eventually, you pulled back, just enough to look at him. He frowned and you reached up a hand to smooth the lines from his forehead.

“Let’s go home.” you whispered and he smiled brightly at your use of the word _home_.

He dipped his head to kiss you, soft and sweet, before reluctantly releasing his hold on you. Moving away briefly, he packed up his things with quiet efficiency and retrieved his jacket and keys. When he was done, he immediately returned to you, placing a hand low on your backto guide you from the room.

You both sat quietly in the back of the cab, so close together that you were practically sitting in his lap. Rafael had an arm around your shoulders and your hand was on his knee, his free hand resting on top of yours. You laid your head on his shoulder again and he pressed a kiss into your hair.

When the cab pulled to a stop outside of Rafael’s apartment building, you disentangled yourselves so that you could get out and Rafael could pay the fare.

He took your hand as he led you into the building. When you got on the elevator, he pulled you close to him once again. Hand cupping your chin, he tilted your head up and pressed his lips to yours. The kiss was gentle and closed mouthed, almost chaste, but still you were breathless when you finally parted.

He pressed his forehead to yours, meeting your eyes and the look of pure unguarded affection on his face made your heart swell.

His arm stayed around you as you walked the short distance from the elevator to his apartment. He hadn’t stopped touching you since that first caress in his office, it was as if he couldn’t bare to be parted from you for more than a few seconds.

Unlocking the door, he allowed you in ahead of him, following you inside before shutting the door and helping you to remove your coat. You put a hand on his arm to steady yourself as you slipped off your heels, then moved away to allow him to take off his own outerwear along with his shoes and socks.

You took the opportunity to survey his apartment. It looked almost exactly the same as it had the last time you had been there, _after_, when you had collected your things. You shut your eyes, trying to erase the painful memory.

Almost as if he could read your mind, Rafael came up behind you, putting his arms around your waist and hugging you tightly.

He pressed a tender kiss to your shoulder. “I’m sorry.” He murmured sadly.

You turned to face him, looping your arms around his neck. “Hush,” you told him firmly, “No more of that. It’s all in the past now.”

The look in his eyes was pained. He shook his head and you could sense a fresh apology on the tip of his tongue, so you surged up to capture his mouth with yours, cutting him off with a searing kiss. He responded instantly, opening his mouth to you, but his hands stayed at your waist.

Before, he had usually been the one to take control, but now he was hesitant. You could sense that he was still unsure, weighed down by guilt. As if he was worried that this wasn’t real, or that you might suddenly change your mind, but you meant what you had said about it being in the past. You wanted to put it all behind you, start again with a clean slate.

“Take me to bed,” you whispered, fingers brushing through the hair at his temple as you looked him in the eyes. “Make love to me, Rafi.” 

His eyes were locked on yours for a moment, searching, until finally, he nodded. He leant forward to kiss you again, this time harder and more sure, his tongue sweeping into your mouth, and then he reluctantly pulled away, gesturing wordlessly for you to lead the way to the bedroom.

When you reached your destination, he stepped up behind you, pulling your body back so it was flush against his. He kissed a path down your neck, from your ear to your shoulder and you hummed in appreciation, one hand coming up to the back of his head, holding him in place.

He nimbly loosened the zipper of your dress and made quick work of pushing it from your shoulders to pool at your feet, his mouth never wavering in its assault. You gasped with pleasure, body melting back into him when he bit down gently at the juncture between your neck and shoulder, his tongue coming out to soothe the bite.

Rafael’s hands skimmed the length of your body, just firmly enough to not be teasing, slowly trailing along the curve of your breasts, down your sides and across your stomach, fingertips brushing along the top of your panties, and back up again.

His touch was driving you crazy, causing heat to pool in your stomach and a steadily increasing ache between your thighs. You knew that he was similarly affected, his breathing was unsteady at your ear and you could feel his erection, pressed against your ass, but he didn’t make any effort to move things along.

He stopped briefly to unclasp your bra and help you slip that off too, before his hands continued their almost torturously slow exploration. You felt like you would spontaneously combust if he kept this up. He was barefoot but otherwise still frustratingly fully dressed. You wanted him inside you, _now_, but apparently he was in no rush.

Just when you thought you couldn’t take it any longer, his hand finally dipped down between your thighs, fingers rubbing you over the thin lace of your panties. He made a low sound of approval at the wetness he felt there. You sighed, pushing your hips forward into his hand, silently begging for more and he rubbed more firmly, until you were gasping and whimpering.

Then, he moved his hand away, hooking his thumbs into the waistband of your panties so that he could pull them down your legs and off, crouching down to help you step out of them when they reached the floor. He took his time, pressing a kiss to your calf, then another to the back of your knee and then to your thigh and hip, as he worked his way back up, his fingertips trailing lightly after his mouth, leaving goosebumps in their wake.

When he finally reached your midsection, he turned you gently to face him, pressing tender kisses to the softness of your belly and up your torso, to the swell of your breasts. He mouthed first at one breast and then the other, tongue swirling over the sensitive buds of your nipples, until they hardened in response.

You moaned, fisting a hand in his hair and tugging until he got the message and moved his head upwards, eyes meeting yours as you captured his mouth in a desperate kiss, needy and demanding, in stark contrast to the sweet, gentle attention he had shown you. He allowed you to take control, opening his mouth to you willingly as you tangled your tongue with his own.

When you pulled away, you were both breathing hard. You began to work on undoing the knot of his tie, moving on to unhook his suspenders, and then unbuttoning his shirt, determined to remove the barrier of his clothing and feel his skin on yours. He shuck the garments easily, dropping them to the floor, but when you reached to open his slacks, he stilled your hands, circling your wrists lightly.

“Not yet.” He whispered, shaking his head slightly.

He nudged you backwards, until you reached the bed and then he pushed you down delicately, holding himself up over you. Shifting to his side, he lay down beside you and propped himself up on an elbow, so that one of his hands was free to caress your naked form. You could feel him, hard, at your hip and you reached out to touch him, but he shook his head again, gently pushing your hand away.

“Not yet.” He repeated. He leant over to kiss you, slow and soft, lips gliding along yours and tongue gently probing.

Setting an unhurried pace, he explored every inch of your body as if it were the very first time he had experienced it, worshipping you with his hands and lips and tongue.

The depth of his feeling for you was apparent in the tenderness of his touch, and the endearments he whispered in both English and Spanish against your skin. When he lifted his head briefly to meet your gaze, the look of quiet intensity in eyes took your breath away.

You had never felt so loved or so wanted in all of your life.

He slipped a hand into the apex of your thighs, running his fingers lightly through your slick folds and you gasped, arching up into his touch. Sliding two fingers into you, he slowly pumped them in and out, thumb grazing your clit and you cried out as you came almost instantly, already so close to the edge from his lengthy ministrations.

Rafael held you as you trembled with the force of your orgasm, nuzzling at your throat as you came down from the high, your body going limp and pliant. When you had recovered enough to regain your senses, you reached for him, tugging him down so that you could kiss him soundly, whilst also trying, again, to free him from his slacks. He kissed you back for a moment before pulling away and he smiled as you made a noise of protest.

He got up off the bed and finally, _mercifully_, removed both his trousers and his boxer shorts. When he returned, he climbed over you, settling himself between your thighs. 

He moaned, eyelids fluttering as he entered you. He seated himself fully inside you in a single thrust, but then he stilled, looking almost pained. His entire body was tense, his eyes squeezed tightly shut, teeth biting down into his bottom lip.

You ran your hands up his arms and across his shoulders, threading your fingers into the short hair at the nape of his neck and pulled him in so you could press a kiss to his forehead.

“Are you okay?” you murmured, shifting slightly beneath him and he made a sound that was half groan, half laugh.

“Never better...” he panted, “Just..._ don’t move_... I need... a minute.”

He took a few deep breaths in and exhaled shakily, willing his body under control. Eventually he started to move, withdrawing almost entirely before rocking his hips forward, burying himself deep inside you. You hands clutched at his back and shoulder, your own hips canting up to meet his as he set a slow, languid rhythm.

You were so close together that your noses were touching, sharing one breath as you gasped and moved together. You moaned in unison as you wrapped your legs tightly around his waist, allowing him in a fraction further.

The ecstasy of being joined with him again after your time apart was almost too much, you were torn between the desperate need to reach your climax and never wanting it to end. Rafael opened his eyes to look at you and you saw those same feelings reflected on his face.

You were suddenly overwhelmed by your love for him, the despair you had felt when you were parted and the unending joy that filled you now that you had been reunited. Tears came unbidden, and you blinked them away. His face creased in concern and he tried to withdraw but you shook your head, holding him firmly in place.

You lifted your hand to caress his face, “I’ve missed you, so much,” you murmured softly.

“I’ve missed you too,” he whispered roughly, eyes shining with his own unshed tears, “I’m so sorry, I...”

“Shhhh...” you soothed, tenderly brushing his hair back from where it had fallen forward. “I know.” 

“I forgive you.” You told him, because you knew that he needed to hear it, and you were surprised to find that you really meant it. 

He said nothing, instead, he kissed you deeply, one hand on the back of your neck and the other at your hip, holding you close as he rocked into you, over and over again.

You felt the familiar tingle of your approaching climax as he reached a hand between you to circle your clit. His own body shuddered, the rhythm of his hips beginning to falter and you knew that he was close too.

“Cum for me,” he murmured in your ear, and you did, his quiet command tipping you over the precipice.

“_Oh, Rafael._..” your eyes drifted closed as your body arched and you tensed around his cock like a vice, trying to pull him impossibly deeper.

He buried his face into the crook of your neck, your name falling from his lips like a prayer as he followed you over the edge, his orgasm washing over him before your own had reached its conclusion.

When you both were spent, he collapsed on top of you, his weight pressing you into the mattress and his now softening cock still inside you. He made no effort to move away and you didn’t ask him to. You ran one hand lightly up and down his back as the other stroked through his hair and he hummed contentedly as you both drifted off to sleep.

Later, when you woke, he was on his back and you were curled against his side, his arms around you and your head resting on his chest. At some point, he had covered you both with the comforter and your legs were tangled together under the covers. You took a moment to just watch him as he slept. He looked so peaceful, his chest rising and falling steadily, his handsome face completely relaxed.

You ran your fingers lightly across the stubble at his jaw and he stirred, turning his head to press a sleepy kiss to your palm. His eyes were still closed but his arms tightened around you and he sighed happily as you snuggled in closer.

“Rafael?” You murmured, as you settled against him again, one arm slung across his stomach.

“Hmmm?” he hummed in response, raising an eyebrow and opening his eyes a little, so he could peer down at you through his lashes.

“I love you.” You tilted your head up and placed an affectionate kiss on the underside of his jaw. He smiled, squeezing you tighter.

When he replied, his voice was thick with emotion and his expression serious, “_Te amo más de lo que nunca sabrás. Eres el amor de mi vida_.” 

**Author's Note:**

> Te amo más de lo que nunca sabrás. Eres el amor de mi vida =  
I love you more than you’ll ever know. You are the love of my life.


End file.
